YAG I: Book of James – Gabrielle Wan
Counting It All Joy
This year at YAG, we studied and learnt lessons from the Book of James. These lessons have impacted me and helped me as I encountered some struggles with my health.
Questioning My Perspective of Life and Suffering
The first lesson from the Book of James was an introduction, where Pastor Mitch taught us that the Book of James is actually one about perspective. The context was the diaspora of the twelve tribes, and it was to the people under these circumstances that James wrote:
“My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience.” (James 1:2–3)
During that YAG session, we discussed how our response to trials is usually the opposite of joy. This is because we expect life to be smooth or easy, and so we are caught off guard when things do not go the way we expect them to. Pastor Mitch said that compared to what the twelve tribes were going through, we could hardly call our daily challenges and struggles “suffering”. If James could tell the twelve tribes to “count it all joy”, we should be able to do so as well. While I understood this theoretically and knew he was right, I left that YAG session feeling conflicted about how to think about the challenges I face in life, as the “suffering” from them still felt real.
As I went about my day-to-day life and continued to dwell on the lesson, I began to realise how what Pastor Mitch said was indeed true, that I was really not suffering at all. While I faced challenges and struggles, all my needs had been met and beyond. How could I say that I was suffering? This realisation made me seriously question my expectations of life and suffering, and how I could learn to “count it all joy”. I then had the opportunity to learn this lesson through a series of events with my health.
Struggles with My Health
One Sunday in July, as I woke up to go to church, I found myself unable to get out of bed. When I opened my eyes, the world spun continuously and I felt extremely nauseated. I realised that I was probably having an episode of vertigo, and used my phone to call my parents for help as I could not even gather the strength to shout. My father stayed at home that day to take care of me, but he could not do much to help relieve any of my symptoms. The only relief I had was when I laid on my side and kept absolutely still. Moving the slightest bit would send the whole world spinning again.
Feeling helpless, extremely ill, and concerned about how I was going to make it to see the doctor if I could not even get out of the bed, I turned to the Lord in prayer. As I did, this verse came back to mind:
“My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience.” (James 1:2–3)
Learning to Count It All Joy
As I laid still in bed with my eyes closed, I began to draw comfort from the thought that this testing of my faith produces patience. In that moment, I realised how I had taken my health so much for granted. While the constant dizziness felt like suffering, I remembered the twelve tribes and their suffering, and I began to count my blessings and dwelt on the Lord’s Word.
The doctor confirmed that it was vertigo, but they had no way to be certain of the root cause of the problem. They also said that the problem could take anywhere from 2 weeks to 3 months to resolve. Medication could also provide limited relief, meaning my ability to do things would be very limited. For the following 2 weeks, the “testing of my faith” continued as the vertigo came and went unpredictably.
Throughout this period, there were many times that I wished I could be better. Tears were shed from how debilitating the illness was and when it was bad, I could do nothing but lay in one position with my eyes closed. In those moments, I prayed and I was constantly reminded of James 1:2–3. As I dwelt on the verses, my thoughts were turned away from the “things that were not going my way” or “not having an easy and smooth life” to a deep thankfulness for what the Lord had provided.
He provided a loving family who took great care of me, friends who cared about me and messaged to ask how I was, and people in church who shared their experiences and advice on how to get better. There were also material blessings: having access to healthcare and medication, a home to rest in, and even a perfect time to fall sick as it was right before starting my first semester in school. But most precious out of all of these were the spiritual blessings: the Lord hearing and answering my prayers for help through the lessons of faith He was teaching me from His Word and through this whole ordeal.
Through this experience, the Lord patiently and gently taught me this lesson about perspective and the reality of James 1:2–3. As I face the unknown challenges of life ahead, the path may not be smooth, and things may not go my way. But I know that the Lord is good, and if I turn to Him and dwell on His Word, I will truly find many reasons to count it all joy.